MY FALL

my fall. no,not the summer winter fall. the Michael smite Lucifer kind of fall.
i recently realized something. something truly disturbing. it hit me suddenly,  and it hit me hard: my grades have been consistently going down since my first semester.
if i were to plot a graph using MS Excel, for results versus time, it would be a straight line with a negative slope.
i had a pretty heated debate with myself, trying to figure out what is happening actually.
my first reason was it could be the change of environment, as i use to live in hostel for 1st 2 semesters.i had a lot of support there, people are constantly studying, and i adapted.
but that couldn’t be it! the first semester i moved out, i achieved dean’s list.
so it led me to thinking, it must be the increasingly tough syllabus.
yea this could be it. but then again, this is not a valid reason..things should start to make sense by now, i am in third year anyways..

and then i realized..

it is my attitude towards things that have changed..
i use to give a fuck, and now i couldn’t give a fuck less..
its like my grades don't really matter anymore..
my record for cutting class is at an all time high..
challenging subjects are taken lightly..
there is always a reason to procrastinate, always a reason to not study..movies, serials, facebook, tennis..
last minute study, which was an option before, now becomes the only option..

THIS HAVE TO STOP.

this will not be my fall.
i have always chose to die in action, to die trying, to go down swingin'.

and the first step to all changes is to admit.
so i admit, i have been slacking.